Update

There really isn't a whole lot of news that I have to share, but we have hit a milestone...month seven of our wait has come and gone, and while we still don't have a referral, the anticipation continues to build with each passing month. In many ways I can't believe how quickly time has gone since May of last year, when we threw ourselves into this ever changing, often frustrating process that is adoption. But throughout it all, this process has brought with it a rich time of spiritual growth and change, and that is something that we never would have experienced, and continue to experience, had it all gone smoothly.

That's not to say, though, that we would like to stay in this waiting period for very much longer, because we don't. I think there comes a time when you just want to be on the other side; the side where your child is now safely in your arms, and the paperwork...the endless paperwork...is over. But I have found that there are so many other factors that weigh in here. Like, how do you plan a much needed vacation when you have to save all your time for a trip to Russia that may, or may not, occur anytime soon? And the boys, who have been my saving grace by keeping me too busy to dwell on the adoption, have also caused me heartache when I think of leaving them for several weeks.

It's a funny thing, really, when I think of the pulls on my heart; wanting to meet our daughter in Russia, and yet, stay with our sons here at home; fully enjoying the growth and experience this adoption has brought us, and yet, wanting it to be over.

It's a wonder I haven't become paralyzed in this web of conflicting emotions, but as I sit here contemplating this fact, I can't help but know exactly what keeps me moving forward....hope.

After all, isn't that what we all need?

Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.