To the tens of people that read this blog: I am still here. I promise.

I really do have intentions of writing regularly, and believe me, I have some fodder for this blog, its just that those intentions have been buried under three years worth of laundry and the frustration that consumes me with the constant stepping in puddles of pee on the floor in the boys’ bathroom.

Are there any other mothers out there who are also perplexed by their boys’ inability to keep a steady stream of urine in the toilet? I cannot be the only one who doesn’t quite understand this.

Oh, and speaking of things that are beyond my comprehension, I want to fill you in on something that is very disturbing to me. It seems that after nearly 5 months of weekly speech therapy sessions, my daughter, who is now an American citizen, but hails from Russia with roots beginning in Uzbekistan, speaks more Korean Tae Kwon Do terms (thanks to Isaiah) than she does English.

I do not wish to discuss these things anymore.

Moving on to more pressing matters:

Adam has taken a job in Bend, Oregon so we are in the process of moving. We both grew up in Oregon, so we will be closer to family again and that will be nice. Also, I still own a few pairs of Birkenstocks and I do drive a Subaru with a bike rack on top, so we will fit in nicely. However, I have three issues with Oregon. They are:

1 – Not being able to pump my own gas. This drives me crazy.
2 - The speed limit is 10 mph slower than anywhere else in the country. In fact, a woman recently said to me that driving through Oregon is always a practice in patience. This is so incredibly true!
3 – Among all the wonderful friends we have met here, my best friend lives here in Idaho. She is my kindred spirit. Our boys are the same age, so we have grown up in this parenting thing together. We easily share our struggles as mothers, and our fears of messing our kids up for life, and also our most embarrassing moments, and then laugh hysterically at the ridiculousness of it all. The thought of not having her close to me makes my heart ache to the point that I can’t fully face it just yet. And that is the hardest part of it all.

Why do I tell you all of this? Because if my family ever becomes lost in the Oregon wilderness, you might have luck finding us if you do one of two things:

1 - Listen for the tiny girl with the deep voice speaking…uh, Korean.
2 - Stay on the lookout for pee stains spread out over a 5 foot radius. The only animals capable of such a feat are commonly referred to as Isaiah and Caleb.
3 - If the above doesn’t work, just call Sheri. She’ll find me.

And, well, I realize that’s three things, but I’m emotional, so you're just going to have to ignore me if I do things that don’t make sense right now.